so i was pissed juz now in the afternoon.. y? coz i didn't go fer my smoke break.. and i was tired.. hence, i was pissed.. and den i was cranky.. PMS maybe.. OMG! i tink i'm freakin hooked to ciggies (like no one knew tt already).. and i thot i was able to control myself.. i tink i SHOULD quit.. well.. the word is should.. coz itz bad fer health.. but tt dun mean i MUST right? heh.

werk's quite slack today.. nth much to do.. did all my paperwork.. and i'm havin a puddle of F&N Orange collectin in the metal tray.. thanks to the leakage in the bag.. and maybe.. our outlet will get again another incentive.. fer sellin the most Lambrini (champagne) among all outlets.. did i mention tt we won $500 in Jan fer havin the best decorated Christmas tree.. well, only the managers get to reap the profit since we WERE the only ones doin up the tree.. so yea, tis time round.. itz to the staff fer promotin the new drink..

it was borin.. so me and Xueyun.. started talkin abt bein in a relationship.. yeah.. she's the one with the issue tt became everyone else's issue.. so wat it was.. letz not go der.. but i noe they've made up and talked things out.. she's confused.. juz like the way i was last time.. she did not noe wat she wants and she's afraid.. things which i can so see in her without her tellin me at all.. i guess she needs to think over of wat she really wants and the way she treats him and all.. she wants him to be sensitive towards her.. well, she gotz to be sensitive towards him as well..

the other day.. i was out with the brothers at Simpang.. and the same topic was debated abt again.. do u agree tt love is all abt compromisin? does it mean u love someone juz coz u are able to compromise things between 2 ppl? WAT IS LOVE?

fer me.. i now believe tt it is abt compromisin but tt dun mean tt juz coz u are able to compromise, u love the other person.. i believe tt love is abt acceptin the other person fer who they are.. inside, as well as outside.. itz not abt possessiveness.. itz not abt bein a control freak.. u do need to control definitely.. but not to the extend of total suffocation.. issues which i had in the past.. i wonder y.. i'll let myself believe tt itz immaturity..

things i've learnt frm past relationships.. has made me see things i refuse to see back den.. or maybe.. itz the person i'm seein now tt made me see all these.. tt itz all not healthy.. not at all in a relationship..

missin you right now *hugZ*

finally.. i get to rest my arse! haha.. tired lerr.. crazy like hell.. i was hyper due to insufficient sleep.. hence the crazier me at werk.. oh well.. now tt i've werked hard.. i'm hungry! should i call Hafiz and get him to accompany me fer supper.. maybe.. maybe not.. i'd juz go home and sleep! haha..

so yesterday.. me and Nik caught Firewall at Cineleisure.. wanted to watch The Art of Seduction.. but coz we were late.. der were only single seats left.. =( so yeap.. the show was alright.. suspenseful accordin to Nik.. haha.. i dun see much reason why ler..

and before tt, we bumped into Lihin and Johan.. did Johan haf a tummy now? mmm.. i dunno.. he's skinny alright but i thot i saw a tummy.. not the pouch kind but yea..

i'm sooo lookin forward to havin my off days!! yippee!! now, now.. wat would i be doin durin those days.. cafe on Wed.. maybe party.. haha.. cannot broke already! all coz of tis fine i'm waitin fer.. i got it coz i parked behind the cafe tt had single zig zag line.. smart rite.. and the letter will be mailed to me la.. i can't let my dad find out coz.. yea.. i'm not on talkin terms with my parents..

mmm.. and did i happen to mention tt derz a new addition to the family yet again.. haha.. my ma brought home a new kitten 2 days ago..i dunno where she found it from.. itz still small.. slightly smaller den Meow Meow (the one i brought home.. wat an original name right?! haha..) wen i brought her home.. tis one's a mixed breed of Persian and sth else i tink.. coz itz a bit cacat.. body's fur's off white in colour and legs, tail, ears and nose are brown.. so i found out from Fadli tt my ma calls in Comot.. haha.. Comot, the Cacat..

oh well, itz still very unfriendly and scared of everyone.. but Meow Meow's bein a good host by accompanyin him/her (i haven't got the chance to check it out yet..) throughout the time and eatin his/her share of food.. Meow Meow greedy la! haha.. she's grown so big now.. and i'm so proud of her.. awww..

Oh, Love
Never knew what I was missing
But I knew once we start kissin'
I found......
Love

- Love, Keyshia Cole

Mama, i don't want to be old

tt was wat a lil girl was tellin her mum in the toilet cubicle next to mine yesterday.. it made me smile.. of coz, the reason why i smiled was coz i thot tt she might have seen sth on her mom as an adult tt made her not wana be old.. haha.. okie.. okie.. i'm so spoilin her innocent image.. but den......

i was walkin out of the toilet to get a smoke.. and den i thot abt wat the lil girl said.. she looked like she's prolly 5 or 6.. wat was i doin wen i was abt tt age.. mmm.. yea.. fer me.. i've always wanted to be older.. i've always wanted to be an adult.. i like to feel like a grown up.. i like it wen ppl show appreciation fer u.. i'd always imagine tt i'm workin.. a successful woman.. in her career, in her love life, in her social life, in watever tt she do.. i even wanted to dress like an adult.. i don't like to wear shoes tt made me look like a kid.. i love to put on heels.. yes.. even wen i was 6.. haha..

and not forgettin.. every lil girl's dream.. to be a Princess.. i wanted to be one.. yeah.. i still am.. my parents' Princess.. and my Prince's Princess.. i would always demand tt i get all those nice long dresses.. in pink.. in white.. whichever i want.. and a matchin pair of shoes.. with heels.. i would wear these durin Chinese New Year.. Christmas.. and even Hari Raya.. i refused to wear Baju Kurung till i was abt 8 or sth.. the dresses would nvr fail to make me feel nice.. pretty.. den again.. i nvr liked the way i looked wen i was younger (not tt i like the way i look now).. i nvr smiled.. haha.. i can't.. i don't noe how to.. in all the pics.. i juz don't smile...

so, life is a cycle tt no one can avoid.. u will be a kid and den a bigger kid.. and den u'll haf kids.. and den u'll see ur kids haf kids.. and den ur cycle will end.... so lil girl, appreciate watever u can haf as a child coz u'll still haf to grow up and grow thu life's cycle the way i am right now.. *smileZ*

okie.. so wat happened the past week??

5th April 2006:-
finally the day has arrived for me to put on my dress.. yea.. my snow white dress.. everyone saw me and they were shocked to see me like tt.. haha.. they said tt i overdressed.. well, it is a d&d afterall.. and i do wanna look nice..

so yea.. the whole day was crazy.. as usual.. BJ8 stood out from the rest.. Matt, Guorong, KaiJian, Peiling, Gina were all der.. but i didn't really mix around with em.. mmm.. yea.. i was busy socializing around.. wat not.. everywhere i go.. derz always ppl to pull me to drink with em.. so yea.. and the best thing tt happened.. i went to tis guy who was performin fer us.. it was rainin.. i took a brolly and went up to him.. we shared the brolly.. haha.. yea.. havoc.. everyone knew me tt instant.. the girl from Pastamania (PMI)..

i defintely enjoyed myself tt day.. not much pics were taken.. took some with Ayu, Emma and the Parkway peepz.. and the day end on a good note.. i tink.. Amaida was drunk.. and so was Meiling.. and not forgettin me.. i was almost der.. heh.

6th April 2006:-
Chipsmore taste similar to Chips Ahoy wen u leave in the fridge or the whole nite in an airconditioned room.. *winkZ*

7th April 2006:-
first day of our chalet.. was initially pissed.. but i was over it.. and after we checked in.. we had dinner at Sakura, Capitol.. was great.. despite the issue tt clouded everyone else.. an issue tt wasn't our issue yet everyone was involved in it..

so yea.. after tt we had our karaoke session.. at The One, Cine.. i'm a member with em.. so anybody up fer some singin session?! which reminds me.. G15 has yet to go karaoke-ing.. *winkZ* and den my GM came.. and wen he came.. he looked at me.. and said, "sth happened durin d&d and i believe itz u and no one else.."

shite.. wat cld i haf done??!! haiz.. yea.. i kinda built up on my reputation as the brolly girl to "tt PMI girl".. oh well.. not worth dwellin on it..

8th April 2006:-
itz our BBQ and games day!! the managers planned the games.. so yea.. tis part.. it rocked.. we laughed so much it hurts.. should see the way the kiddos played the games.. games they'd nvr see themselves play in their lives! wen i get hold of the pics.. i'll post it up..

and after BBQ, it was swimmin time fer me.. haven't swam in ages.. haha.. had fun with the kids.. and Harris.. as usual.. shy.. like right!! and after the brief meetin we had.. it was over to more drinkin games.. i wasn't myself tho.. i dunno why.. so yea.. Jean had to drink like 1/2 cups of on the rocks.. 3 times!! i helped her out as i dun want her to go sleepin in the toilet..

and den it was party in the dark.. we were blasting songs.. and me and Jean were entertainin the guys.. dancin and wat not.. i tried lap dancin on Jizzete and she was pushin me away.. shy la.. and Harris joined us.. and i can't help but to see his cute dancin manners.. and we had tis challenge.. who can imitate the best.. i was doin the demo.. and Jean, Mary and Harris were tryin to follow.. we all end up in loads of laughter instead.. and wen Lean Back was played.. we literally leaned back.. thanks to Mary and Jean.. hahaha.. so yea..

i enjoyed myself afterall frm d&d to chalet to everythin else.. great time i had! woo hoo!!

okie... werk IS boring! i got nth to entertain myself with... haiz...

oh wait.. i am lookin forward to d&d tomZ!! and i'm meetin my aunt in the morn before i meet J8 peepz... she wanna bring me to tis place where she's takin Mak Andam's course... haha.. and she needs a guinea pig.. and tt person is ME! haha.. so yea.. let her doll me up and den i'll go home put on my dress and den go meet em! yay!

which reminds me..... i still haven't cleaned the stain on the sleeve..... shite!

*thinkin of you*

i took a cab to werk thinkin tt it'd juz be another borin day.. and i was wrong!

at 1240, i received a call.. it was Nik.. he asked where i was.. and i told him i was at werk already.. and he asked me to come out and meet him at the "Gigi Girl".. hahaha.. and there he was.. i was suprised! yet again.. point blank.. haha.. and the hint was der again.. and i didn't see it.. i so live up to my bimbotic-ness! haha.. so yea.. Nik was sweet juz by doin tt.. and he made it even sweeter by gettin me sth frm Mac.. =) he did nothin but to make my day a happier start..

so i juz had my lunch, all filled with looove.. haha.. so yea.. and to top it off.. we pulled the trick on Weng.. coz of Sun, Jizzete found a passport photo tt a customer left behind and me and one of the staff, Xueyun decided to write a love note to Weng sayin tt tis lady was his pri sch mate and tt she saw him at KL and tt she's always had feelings fer him.. snd she came down to S'pore juz to look fer him.. and we left a Malaysian number and asked him to call her.. haha..

so wen i came to werk juz now.. i passed him the envelope with the photo and said tt someone came on Sun morn to look fer him.. and since he was on leave, she wanted us to pass the letter to him.. haha.. he opened it up.. and said tt it could have not been anyone else but us.. hahaha.. well, firstly, Xueyun spelt his name in Mandrin wrongly.. and the number tt we wrote in the letter was fer Sabah/Sarawak.. couldn't be from his hometown coz i have no idea where he came from.. and thirdly, Xueyun decided to name the lady Ming Li.. and like fuckin coincidence.. he has a fren whose name is Ming Li and she is currently werkin in S'pore.. daym! haha.. and he still doesn't noe the fact tt it was my idea la.. haha..

so Xueyun asked me wen shld we break the news to him.. and i told her nvr! let's tell him next year, 1st April.. hahaha.. how mean! hahaha.. so yea.. my day is goin on well right now.. so far.. till......

Hafiz called me and said tt he fuckin lost his Nano!! i was like wat the fuck?! he was takin a dump and left his Nano on the toilet roll thingy and he fuckin forgot abt it and left the toilet.. realised only fuckin 10 mins later which was too late! like Hafiz darlin.. wat the fuck were u thinkin abt??!! haiz.. silly him.. oh well.. still nth can spoil my day now..

i'm a chubby, bubbly girl.... lalalalalla lala lalalalaa.....

itz a borin day at werk today!!

haiz.. not many ppl were seen in the mall and not many of them dine in at Pastamania either.. i sound juz like i'm writin my daily report.. haha.. so yea.. one of my staff can't werk so i persuaded Gina to werk.. and i thot i could go home with her.. and den she said tt her bf's pickin her up.. how come he get to book out on a Monday nite?! hmph! so yea.. maybe i'll get a ride frm Eric later.. see if he's willin to la.. haha..

so Gina was tellin me stuff.. things i heard wen i went back to visit Emma and all.. seems like the "promotion" things makin him swell headed.. haiz.. sad la.. and Jacky called me juz now.. oh yea.. he's promoted to Area Manager.. *hopes real hard he gets our district* he was askin me how i was and all.. askin me if life's stressful.. oh well.. i told him not la.. i mean derz only so much i can tell him now.. wait till he calls me again and den i'll pour out my sorrows to him.. not tt i haven't.. haha.. so now tt he's the Area Manager.. does tt mean i can get him to promote me?! heh. fat hope dila!

der'll be another Area Manager as well.. haven't met him.. and i dunno how he's like.. heard tt he's got lotsa experience and all.. we shall see abt tt yea..

and i'll be on leave frm Wed till next Tues!! yee har! hahaha.. well.. Wed's my d&d, so i requested off.. Thurs so tt i can relax and spend some time watchin DVDs... and Fri, Sat & Sun will be J8's chalet.. and den to top it off, she decided to give me off on Mon and Tues as well.. mmm.. and i gotta start thinkin of some good LSM fer J8.. haiz..

The Bottom Line
You can trust those closest to you now, so open up and share your inner feelings.

In Detail
Today you take a lollygagging kind of meander through one of the showing-signs-of-springtime gardens of your soul. Yep, it's an ideal day to wander around your own insides and check out just how you're doing, anyway. Stop a while at Relationship Pond, for example, and gaze in. What do you see? Little tadpoles? Murky waters? Your own crystal-clear reflection? Sprint as quickly as you can across the Field of Ambition, and then rest a while under the Tree of Contentment.

can i juz skip all the way to Tree of Contentment? hahaha..

okie.. is it bad wen i still feel tight in my chest area since yesterday? mmmm..

the other time, the doctor said tt itz coz i've been handlin too much heavy stuff.. which i can't avoid at werk.. i mean.. i dun really wanna disturb the kitchen guys to help me carry the stuff.. and to make things even more wonderful.. 90% of my staff are female.. not the kind tt can really lift heavy things.. so yea.. i gotta do it on ma own..

oh well.. maybe.. i've been smokin too much.. or maybe i'm dyin! hahaha.. if only i still haf the muscle relaxants.. itz so nice.. like i take it before i sleep and fall into a deep nice sleep and wake up feelin as light as a feather! taa dah! haha..

*dila goin bonkers* i'm still thinkin of my new dress.. *BIG GRINZ* i was upset wen i saw a stain on the sleeve yesterday.. but it can be cleaned.. =) and i was thinkin of purple orchid in my hair to go along with it.. so cute right! haha.. seriously.. i look like a lil girl!

i'm a happier person now.. haha.. coz my Prince juz called me! *misSing u*

i'm already at werk!! haiz.. due to my ever clumsiness.. i forgot to leave the key in the POS fer Jizzete..

so yea.. i'm also pissed! why?! coz i can't get a freakin cab at all!! itz always like tis!! itz a freakin Sunday mornin.. no one's rushin to get to the office.. it was 945 and who would get up so freakin early on a lazy day like tis.. and as if things were not bad enuff, i had like 2 competitors.. 1 opposite me.. and tis auntie who happily cut before me.. and tried to hail cabs.. shite! i walked to Compasspoint taxi stand thinkin tt i'd get a better chance den the auntie.. and guess wat.. der were freakin 5 ppl in the queue.. and NO cabs in sight!!

i mean like.. i thot the cabbie market's saturated.. so where the heck are all the abundance of cabbies tt we always see wen we dun need em?? haiz.. and tis issue has not like been around only since yesterday.. itz been ever.. especially in my area.. yes.. the grey area.. Sengkang.. but wat the heck.. even back in school days wen me and Azila were on the cabbie mood.. she's always the one gettin the cab before me.. fer heaven's sake!! itz Punggol and she has more cabbies den i do? wtf?! haiz..

psst. i haf a way not to make the cabbie market tt saturated and a way fer u guys to earn ur livin better.. START COMIN TO SENGKANG AND PICK US UP!!

i bought meself a new, pretty white dress fer my d&d!!

hahaha.. yea.. me and Nik walked ard Tampines Mall and Century Sq.. and i made up my mind to buy it.. couldn't find anythin nice.. was lookin fer a nice long, flowin white skirt and matchin it with a white top and a halter bikini top.. yea.. the d&d will be at Sentosa.. where the heck is KM8 beach seh.. i dunno.. not gonna drive coz we're plannin to club after tt.. hence the reason why i bought the dress also.. now.. shld i get a nice pair of slip on.. or shld i heed Nik's advise and wear my leather ark sandals.. mmm..

so yea.. we watched Ice Age 2.. it was cute and romantic.. in a mammothic way.. hahaha.. i thot of bringin Fadli to watch it.. since i watched it already.. i'd juz get the VCD and i can watch it again with him at home.. yay!

i can't wait to wear my new pretty dress!! the salesgirl said tt itz called a "snow white" dress.. it made me feel no more den a lil girl wearin it.. hahaha.. oh well.. itz gonna be a disappointment to the guys coz they're like expectin me to don a bikini... like no way! hahaha.. well.. den again.. maybe i will.. *winkZ*